Confessions

Today:

When I woke up this morning I could hear muted voices in Chase and Cohen's bedroom. Lately when Chase wakes up, she doesn't wake me up. She instead gets some books and climbs into Cohen's crib and proceeds to read to him. Its actually kind of nice. When I walked in, with my camera at ready, Chase was reading Love You Forever. With every page turn she would say "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you'll be."

I must say, it was a good start to my day.

After breakfast, I sat down to check my email etc...and then it hit me like a large painful brick. I agreed to speak in church on Sunday. Just typing that sentence got my heart racing. I DO NOT like speaking in public, in front of large audiences. I have to speak on motherhood since its Mothers Day and all on Sunday. Why do I so readily agree to these things?

So, instead of checking email I start researching talks and things that I can include in my talk. I came across this talk by Sheri L. Dew. Loved it. But still, it didn't change the fact that I would almost rather get another kidney stone then speak in church. Kidney stones are more painful than child birth. I know because I have experienced both. Maybe that should be my talk.

"Good morning brothers and sisters. Kidney stones are more painful than child birth. Happy Mothers Day. Amen."

After attempting to come up with something to talk about, I realized the morning was gone, and I was still in my pjs in front of the computer while my children were destroying my home around me. So I decided to put it off.

Whats wrong with this picture? I will tell you. Cohen is pulling all my pewter dishes off this shelf, and Chase is watching Sponge Bob in Cohen's walker. Its at this point I realized its time for a picnic.

Picnic time!!!

Bat, bug catcher, and sidewalk chalk. She is good to go.

Wearing Mom's high heels. Don't be jealous of our ghetto backyard. If you try hard enough, you to can have a ghetto backyard.

I decided to cheat for our picnic and get a happy meal for Chase at Mcdonalds. Don't judge me. She eats healthy 95.7% of the time.

On the way she wanted to listen to Perfect Day by Lady Antebellum. Yes, I confess, sometimes I listen to country music. Sometimes I am ashamed of it, but sometimes I can't resist a feel good country song. Jamison pretends he doesn't know I sometimes listen to country. Its better that way. I just consider myself very well rounded when it comes to music.

Also, I like hearing Chase belt out:

"A perfect day.

Wish I could find a way to stay

Lost in this moment now."

Its awesome.

Now, its nearing the evening and instead of working on my talk, I am once again on the computer while Cohen pulls dishes off my shelf.

Peace out.

Today I realized what he meant by "that look".

As I was lugging Cohen around church last Sunday looking for someone, a certain gentleman in our ward approached me and said "You know, both of your children have a certain look."

I replied, "Let me guess. The look of Jamison? I hear that all the time."

He said, "No, they both look like they have a very juicy secret that only they know, and they aren't planning on telling anyone."

Interesting. I had never noticed that before...until today. Every time I looked at Cohen, he looked back at me with this look. This look that said "You are so naive lady. You have no idea the havoc I can cause. Don't believe me? Watch this"...as he proceeds to smack our T.V screen showing me that yes, if he tried hard enough he could knock the whole thing over.

I mean look at this picture. Thats a smug face if ever I saw one.

In fact I got an even better picture of his smugness, but I look similar to a rhino in the photo so I chose not to post it.

Chase on the other hand...I haven't noticed a "juicy secret look" about her (as this man so weirdly put it). It seems all she wants to do these days is pretend to either be a dog, a lion, or a dinosaur. Lately she is also obsessed with spiders, worms, and snakes as in she wants to pick them up and shove them in my face.

Today she kept bringing up dinosaur poop. Not sure why. Probably that weird episode of Dinosaur Train she watched a few days ago that talked about dinosaur poop and all the great things that can be found in it. Eew.

Super Guy to the rescue!!! Thats what Chase likes to say when she is pretending to fly.

Here is our dog...I mean daughter Chase. I know that sounds bad, but if I let her, she would be outside all day long with nothing but her underpants on, pretending to be a dog. And if I refer to her as Chase, she will tell me "No, mom!! I'm a dog!!"

Cohen hates the grass. If I need to set him down on it for any reason, there has to be something for him to sit on. If he is on grass directly he screams.

It also seems that he is close to walking. I love watching him cruise around holding on to this thing. You would be surprised at how fast those little legs can go.

Today we also drove around looking at homes for sale. It seems we are in a state of uncertainty about where we will be in the next few months. We have a few options...if only we could decide which one is best....

I hate making big decisions.

I'm not the only one who watched these movies.....right?

A few weeks back "The wives club", decided it was our turn to go see a "midnight movie" (except we saw our midnight movie at around 7:00pm). We went and saw Alice In Wonderland (and can I just say that I LOVED it).

Anyways, as we were sitting waiting for the movie to start we started talking about movies that remind us of our childhood, and how creepy some of them were, and how when you go back and revisit the movies from your childhood, you end up a little disappointed. Its never as good as you remember (unless your watching Goonies. That movie is always good, no matter the era).

All I can say is, the 80's was a time of some crazy weird movies.

Example: Remember Legend? I loved this movie when I was little. Young Tom Cruise anyone? Also, I think its the only other movie Simone (from Ferris Buellers Day off) was in.

Girls Just Want to Have Fun. I remember my Grandma had a copy of this movie, and every time I went to her house I HAD to watch it. My 7 yr old self thought it was the coolest movie ever. Most people associate Sarah Jessica Parker with Sex In the city. I associate her with Girls Just Want to Have Fun. I am always surprised when someone hasn't seen or heard of this movie (which I think is a lot of people). I mean, its so awesome how is that even possible? :)

Labyrinth is another one of my creepy 80's favorites. David Bowie with woman hair? Check. David Bowie in spandex? Check. Did they not look at him dressed like that and wonder if the world really wanted to see his manly goods in those spandex pants?

So, this version of Alice In Wonderland is a movie I did NOT like as a child. It always creeped me out big time. When I bring it up a lot of people have no idea what I am talking about, but this picture proves that it was a real movie, and I think whoever made it was high on drugs.

Same with Return to Oz. Scared me to death as a small child. We talked about watching it at our next movie night, just to see if it really is as creepy as we remember. Do we dare???

Here is a clip from 1985 version Alice In Wonderland. Watching it brings back that creepy feeling. I hated this movie.

1 year older.

Today is my birthday. It has been a weekend full of insane partys and getting wild.

Just Kidding.

Actually, its been a very pleasant low key weekend. Friday, my Dad and Step-mom had us over for dinner. Good times. Chase worships my little sisters. I always enjoy watching her interact with them. I think its cute. I can tell she thinks they are the coolest.

Saturday Jamison and I went to dinner, then headed to The Gateway. Jamison's gift to me was a shopping spree at Anthropologie with no whining kids or impatient husbands to distract me. It was so nice. I wish we were rich so I could have purchased everything I desired... alas we are not, but it was still fun picking out a few things to freshen up our humble abode.

(I did finally get the headband I have been eyeing for a while now. I am modeling it in the above pic. I know you can't really see it, but it is there, and it is awesome. Trust.)

Chase and Hailey

Today my Mom and Step-Dad had us over for a family dinner to celebrate. Homemade pizza. Yum.

Good times for the kids were had on Chase's four wheeler. I can thank my Dad for that. He gave it to her when we were there on Friday. She gets nervous driving it, so her cousins are more than willing to help out.

It also has to be mentioned that my poor little man got crazy sunburned on Saturday. While I was at work Saturday morning, Jamison took the kids outside to play/do yard work, and didn't put sun screen on this little red haired pale skinned child.

Lesson learned.

Its hard to tell from this pic (taken with my phone), but his cheeks and head got fried, along with his arms. Can you see the farmers tan?

Speaking of pictures....can't wait to get my replacement camera. I am sick of taking pictures with my phone.

It was a good birthday weekend. Do I feel any different being 1 year older?

No. I still feel like an 18 year old at heart.

Do I still look 18?

No.

I want botox.

Maybe that will be my birthday present next year:)

Trying to figure out this computer is really hard.

I am not used to a Mac...as in I have never used one.

I am so confused, and can't figure out how to do the simplest things.

I truly feel like the biggest idiot.

But I did figure out how to take a picture of myself amidst the confusion.

Where is my husband when I need him?

Can you tell I'm having a great day?

P.S.

Is the butt crack on my forehead as obvious to everyone else as it is to me? I often forget I have a dent on my head until I look at pictures. Yikes.

A lot has happened since my last post....but not really.

To start off, this is my new and improved blog. There was confusion. I am not going private. If you have left a comment within the last week, I don't need to email you because you have found the new blog address. Make sense? Are we clear? I thought we were clear???

Anywho....we had a picnic in our backyard today. I enjoyed it. Mostly because its funny watching Cohen try to swipe Chase's food, and he HATES grass, so he just stays on the blanket. I like it. I don't have to chase him around.

Lately we have just been enjoying the warm weather, and that about tops the excitement meter around here.

I finally saw Alice in Wonderland. I wish Chase was a little older so I could have taken her. I loved it.

Jamison just saw Kick Ass. Apparently its really good...like maybe his new favorite movie?

The day the bastards broke into our house was hard. That night I went to Muse with Chelsea, Cory, Jessie, and some other girl. Muse made it not such a bad day. If I could speak to them I would thank them.

Please enjoy the high quality clip taken with my phone.

Whats mine is now yours...apparently

Here I am, posting from a borrowed lap top. If things were as they should be, I would be posting from my laptop about my husbands birthday, and our fun filled Easter weekend. Nope. All because some idiot human being who has no sense of right and wrong, and thinks its ok to steal things that someone worked hard for. I came home from running errands a few days back to find our front door obliterated, and many of our belongings missing....our laptop and my camera included. All our pictures. Gone.

But to tell you the truth, the thing that bothers me more than the missing stuff, is the fact that a complete stranger was in our home, our bedroom, going through our things. Ever since it happened our house just hasn't felt the same. I can't quit shake this creepy violated feeling. I hate it. All of our things can be replaced, but how dare this person come into our home and feel they have the right to do this!! Besides the fact that they were also in my kids bedroom. It makes me want to hurt who ever did this. Badly. Luckily one of my neighbors did see something, and luckily the police were incredibly nice and helpful about the whole situation (I was pretty shaken up at first).

Anyways, as a result of this I have learned a few things.

1. Everyone should have an alarm system in there home. It doesn't matter where you live, or what time of day it is. If someone is desperate, they will break into your house.

2. If you have personal documents hidden in your home, they are not hidden well enough. Everything should be locked up.

3. You should always be aware of your surroundings. If you see a suspicious car in your neighborhood, or a car in your neighbors drive way that isn't normally there, always jot down the licence plate number. I am very greatful for our neighbor who noticed an out of place car in our driveway.

The one good thing that happened that day was the Muse concert. I loved it. I love Muse. They are sexy and so is there music.

(Also, as an added precaution, sometime within the next few weeks I will be changing my blog address and title. If you are someone who reads this blog, and would like to continue reading this blog, please leave me your email address, and when I get all of this worked out I will email whoever with the new blog address.)

Playing dress up, my daughters love for Dancing With The Stars, and the joy my son's chubbiness brings me.

When it is March, and its a blizzard outside, and we are bored.. the only solution is the dress up trunk. We had a good time with it yesterday.





Cohen did a lot of standing holding on to this. I enjoy his chubbiness.
I love them.

Ms. Chase LOVES Dancing With The Stars. We watched it last night for the first time this season. Honestly, I'm not to into it, but its worth watching just to record her crazy moves.

The End.

Monkey pajamas and Papa Paparazzi

There are two things you don't fight Chase on. Those are: what she wears to bed, and the music she listens to. Case in point: for the last few weeks Chase has been insisting that she wear her monkey pajamas to bed. Neither Jamison or I had any idea what she was talking about. We couldn't recall her ever owning monkey pajamas. After us telling her over and over again that she doesn't have any monkey pajamas and her insisting to us that she does, she finally resigns herself to picking out some other pajamas (and SHE has to pick them out, if we try to there will be hell to pay). Last night as usual she told Jamison she had to wear the monkey pajamas. Jamison told her she didn't have any. She said she did. He asked her where they were. She said "under the bed". Under her bed I have some plastic bins stored with clothes that don't fit her anymore...and what do you know! There are the monkey pj's I had totally forgotten she had. They clearly don't fit her anymore being a size 2t. Yes, she is 3, but the girl wears 4t-5t clothes. Shes tall. So instead of fighting her on it (which we have learned its sometimes just not worth the fight) Jamison crammed her into her monkey pjs. Way way way to small, but she was happy so whatev. Fast forward to around 1am. She comes into our room delirous and crying. Most likely because she is very hot in the monkey pjs, and its 3 sizes to small. So at 1am we change the pjs and hope that her lesson is learned because, yes, sometimes she has to learn the lesson on her own.

And then there is Chase and her music. She is picky. When she was a baby I had hopes of acclimating her to really good music. I had visions of her singing along to some of my favorite bands with me. No such luck. Its either her kindermusic CD or Lady GaGa. The girl knows almost every single word to Paparazzi. I honestly can't remember the first time she heard the song or how I discovered she liked it so much, but now when we get in the car she asks to listen to it all the time.I downloaded the song to my ipod back when I thought it was cute that she liked it so much. I regret that decision. I have made a rule that we have to take turns when it comes to the music. If she was in control Paparazzi would be on repeat everywhere we went. I wish I could say she was loving her cd of primary songs, or even good music for that matter....but no, its Paparazzi .

Sometimes it scares me. This girl with a mind of her own. I love her. I don't want her to grow up. Its so hard when I tell her something like "Chase you need to be nice" and she replys "ACTUALLLLYYY Mom, YOU need to be nice" . It a not so nice reminder that she is getting older, and (in her mind) wiser. Some days I find myself trying to cuddle and hug and kiss her a million times because I want to get it all in while I can, before she starts fighting it to much.
Above pics: For the first time ever she actually asked me to take her picture. She told me she "needed to make some funny faces for the camera so we could have some funny pictures". I like the last picture the best. She looks like a Who from whoville....my little cindy lou who.

Lets pretend

that this is my backyard, and its summer time, and I just invited you all over for an evening picnic. Doesn't that sound marvelous?

It does to me. Image found via sfgirlbybay via gardenrooms

I ain't getting any younger

but I still got it. Chase and I had a high kick competition today. I am really good at the high kick, and the splits. I also still consider myself a very accomplished jazz,hip-hop, and tap dancer (even though its been maybe just a few years since I gave up dance). I mean, if you saw my moves you would be really intimidated, I am THAT good. Ok, so I mean, you might not be intimidated, you might actually laugh in my face...but whatev. At least I've got the high kick.

Wait, what was that? You want to come to my house and have a tap off?

Bring it.

Yesterday...oh yesterday.

Pic taken at the zoo about 2 minutes before everything started going down hill.

I am so glad you are over. I had every intention of making it a great day. We had plans to go to the zoo with friends...and we did. But as is Chase's style, she wanted to make it incredibly hard for me. I think she was tired, and maybe didn't feel good. Sometimes I look at her and wonder how this 3 yr old knows how to push every one of my buttons. She pushes me to my limit more times than I can keep track of, and its at that point that a say a little prayer telling God hes got to take over because I am done. Thankfully Cohen slept through the whole debacle. And of course after we got home she was an angel, and I kept wondering where this girl was when we were out in public.

And to compound things I haven't been sleeping well....and if theres one thing I know, its that a good nights sleep can work miracles, but when I don't sleep everything starts unraveling around me. I mean seriously who knew how much a good nights sleep could improve everything about you! Seriously, I need to figure out how to start sleeping better. Yesterday I reached that point of exhaustion where I didn't know if I should start crying or laughing uncontrollably. I kindof did both.

Needless to say, Jamison came to my rescue (he could tell I was at the breaking point), and once we got the kids to bed we watched the episodes of The Office and 30 Rock that we missed on Thursday. Got some needed laughter relief. Then I needed sleep relief, but sleep was not coming. Sometimes the only solution is to read a book or watch whatever on my iphone until I can't keep my eyes open any longer, and since I keep hearing about this show, Who Do You Think You Are, I decided to check it out. I really liked it. This first episode was with Sarah Jessica Parker. Basically every episode is a different famous person who is researching there ancestory, and trying to figure out where they came from. Watching it made me want to find out more about my ancestors. I know my family has done some geneology (because we are Mormon, and thats what us Mormons do), but I have never really looked into it. Now I want to. After watching this I find it so fascinating. I thought the show was really well done, and if you have a few spare moments you should check it out to(nbc.com).

Weekend away at the cabin

Spent the weekend at the parentals cabin with the whole fam. I love it there. Good times included snow mobiling, riding the 4-wheelers, lots of hot tubbing, games, and moving watching. Not so good times included Cohen not eating or sleeping the entire trip, and the fact that me, Jamison, my Step-Dad, and my Mom all managed to get the snowmobiles stuck/buried at least once (probably due to the fact that the snow was like 8 feet deep and it was all pure powder). My Mom actually had search and rescue come to her aid, she got the snowmobile buried so deep. That woman is like evil knievel on any sort of recreational vehicle.
Little chubby man in big bathtub.

Wearing your snow boots with your swimming suit is hot.


Best part of hot tubbing is getting out, laying in the freezing snow, then jumping back into the nice hot water. Chase got out and jumped back in around 500 times.

Watching movies/playing games. Zach showed off his laying in the snow for a long time skillz.

Trying to smile while wearing goggles is hot.

Jamison and Chase about to take a wild ride on the 4-wheeler.

Love the cabin...love it even more in the summer months. Bonfires by the lake, swimming in the pool, more 4-wheeling (but without your face getting frozen), and a little bit of fishing..but not to much because I get bored. Can't wait to head back up in a few months.

That hair! Those eyes! Those chubby legs!

All three melt my heart everytime I look at him. I have never met anyone as happy as this kid. He will laugh at everyone and everything. And how, I wonder, did Jamison and I, who both have very brown eyes, end up with this blue eyed baby? Some hidden recessive gene I suppose. I just can't help but stare at him in wonder. And everywhere we go, we hear at least once, "Look at that red hair!!" Jamison says its not easy growing up with red hair. But really, I am SO glad that Cohen got Jamison's hair. That thick wavy hair. I am in love with it.

Everytime I change his diaper I have to squeeze those chubby legs. And how when I tickle his neck roles he curls into a ball and laughs so hard his whole body is shaking...nothing better. And the conversations we have, where he is speaking giberish, and I am saying "tell me all about it"...I love those conversations. He looks at me like what he is saying is so important. And that smile! Its so big his eyes close.

Hello March, so glad you are here!

Can you say seasonal depression? I am beyond sick of the cold weather. So sick of it in fact, that if I could find a way, I would move away from Utah, and live somewhere much much warmer year round.

Then there was today. The first day of March. It was actually warm. We busted out the bike/wagon/baseball bat and enjoyed all three in the warm sun. We have attempted to do said things in the weeks previous to today, but ended up back inside due to the freezing cold.
And yes, Ms. Chase has been ill these past few days, so in my mind I am thinking that a little warm weather play outside will do her some good. It really didn't. She ended up back inside exhausted. She fell asleep on "the big bed", and didn't wake up until after 5. She is still awake watching Americas Funniest Home Videos. She loves that show. I don't even know when she started watching it, but she did, and she loves it. She also loves watching laughing cats on You tube. She will ask to watch it over and over and over again until I cave, and then I hear the obnoxious laughing and want to throw the computer across the room. I curse the day my little sister showed Chase that video. I was going to post a link to it, but decided against it. You would thank me if you had ever seen it.

Chase loves to play in the dirt pretending she is growing a bean stock. She gathers rocks, tells me they are seeds, plants them, then shows me the "beans" that grew. Here she is showing me some of her prized beans.

Cohen just chills in the wagon, happy to be chewing on the straps.

I have a few other things to share.

1. Anyone else watching Lost these days? I am. Last week I discovered that before the new episode they replay the previous weeks episode, but with captions explaining to you every little detail of whats going on and how it relates to what has happened in previous episodes/seasons. I appreciated this, and by watching and reading the captions realized how much is really going right over my head. But I will say this. I was proud of myself last week while watching the new episode. While watching it I realized that the whole theme of the episode was Alice in Wonderland/Through the looking glass. Remember Jack's son had a copy of the book? Also when Jack goes to his x-wifes home the key is hidden under the white rabbit. Also the whole looking in the mirror and being able to see a different realm. I am beginning to realize that there are lots of themes such as this in all the episodes but you really have to pay attention to catch it. And....you probably think I am the biggest nerd ever now. What ever.

2. I am reading a really good book. Its called The Swan Thieves. The author is Elizabeth Kostova, who is the same woman who wrote The Historian (which is, by the way, one of my favorite books of all time, and if you haven't already read it, you should do so immediatly). I am about half way through The Swan Thieves, and so far, I love it, so I am recommending it to anyone who reads this blog (but if you haven't read The Historian, please read it first. You won't regret it). I am such a book nerd. I own and have read an insane amount of books. Like I have said before, I hope to one day have a library in my house with a cozy window seat to read on. Hence all the books I own. They will one day be sitting on the shelf of the dream library.

Thhhheee EEEnnd.