The flood gates have opened.

Lately I have been feeling very confrontational. The funny thing about that is that I'm not really a confrontational person. I have come to the conclusion that as a result of holding my feelings on certain things inside for so long, they can't be held in any longer.

Example: A certain girl I know (whom will remain anonymous), is married to a certain man who is a jackass. She complains to me quit often of her situation, and I tell her my feelings about how she should leave him over and over and over and over again. But I try to be nice. I really try. Then the other day I exploded. In so many words I basically told her she was as much an idiot as he was for staying with him. I told her someone should turn her into child protective services for making her daughter live like she is. I then told her that better yet, I think I will turn her in. I'll be honest. I sat on my high horse and told her exactly how it is (because of course I have everything figured out and I am perfect..wink, wink). I was mean. Really, really mean (I will leave out some of the more choice things I said). When I was done she had this expression like I had just punched her in the face. Then the tears. Oh the tears. I won't go into the conversation that ensued. But it got me to wondering "where in the world did that come from? The normal me would never had said those mean things."

Another example: I went with my mom to pick up some furniture she had purchased. Since I drive an SUV I offered to take her so we could fit the table in my car. About 3 people that worked at the furniture store helped us out to the car and were trying to decide on how to proceed in putting the table in. I sat and listened to them try and figure it out for about 5 minutes, and then BAM. I couldn't take it any longer. I turned into one of those custumers I despise. I told them I didn't have time for this. I grabbed that incredibly heavy table all by myself, and told them if they wanted to stick around I would show them how it was done. I then said "Does it seriously take 3 of you to figure this out?" My Mom looked at me like an alien had abducted her daughter and replaced her with this pissed off lunatic. Yikes. It wasn't pretty.

This is what I think. Sometimes I hold stuff in. Sometimes when I should say something, I don't because I worry to much about what people will think, or about hurting someones feelings.

I am now realizing I can't do it anymore because the result is me spontaneously turning into a b****. After holding stuff in for so long, you get to a point where you can't do it anymore...then you can't help but unload it on the first people that come along, whether they deserve it or not.

So, there you have it. My lesson has been learned, and thank you for letting me share.